Sunday, October 22, 2017

Me Too.

So yeah. Here's my story.

The first time i was sexually assaulted i was say 3 or 4, not in school yet, i was out alone & sitting under a tree waiting for my brother to get back from his classes. No one around. Until this stranger comes takes me to a public restroom and molested me. I was distraught. Came back home, told no one. 'Cause i didn't know it was an assault. I thought it was normal.

Then i was in 3rd grade. These youngster guys from street corner were 'friends'. I used to talk to them & just that. Suddenly they're in my school, i was happy to see 'friends'. One of em made me sit on his lap and his fingers were in the wrong places on me. It pained after he let me go. They weren't allowed on school premises after that.

The next time i was sexually harassed was by my father's friend who btw still is a friend who comes around. He put his arm around me reaching me in the boob. I was like what the fuck! Young and naive i was. Never told my parents 'cause Indian parents don't talk such things. It still disgusts me even today that he has a daughter & that I've to see that ugly face & fake greet that perv. 

There was this period of time from 9th grade till 12th. I used to take the same route from school to home every day. This perv from school, wearing school uniform, on his bicycle, followed me, found me alone & flashed me. Wound talk dirty & i would just walk as fast as my legs could take me. He would cut across my path in his bicycle, dominating & trying to scare me. I never took that route after & would avoid being alone on the road. I hope he's miserable now.

Many strangers whose faces i didn't see & I'll never see again. In buses, on the road. Alone and crowded.
This guy i fell in love with for the first time. We went out a few times. He already had a girlfriend but instead of avoiding me he took me out. To a movie once & harassed me. So like if a girl likes you & you can't commit but you're only trying to be friendly & not hurt her, is not exactly an excuse to err.. harass her? She set herself up to me, she came to me, i was only being friendly & nice =/= is not the same to 'so i can harass her'.


Then this last one, the narcissistic serial molester, is first of all sick in the head. Narcissist, sociopath, asshole who lacks empathy big time. Yes i was obsessed with him. That let him molest me. He doesn't regret it, own up to it, sorry or guilty about it 'cause he thinks it was not wrong or that it wasn't his fault. Flaky, manipulative and sick absofuckinglutely sick in the head. Traumatized me for 4 years. Still healing.